Life can throw us some unexpected challenges. Imagine this: a presentation goes wrong, a business opportunity doesn't go as planned, or a family event takes an awkward turn. It happens to the best of us. But the thing is, it's not the end of the world!
Sometimes, when things go off track, we tend to blow them out of proportion, thinking, "That was a complete disaster!" That kind of thinking can lead us down a gloomy path. And it happens to our clients, too. But as a therapist and coach, we've got to think with a cool head and think resourcefully to help ourselves and our clients out.
Imagine your client's day went horribly wrong - perhaps an important presentation didn't go to plan, or they missed out on a business deal, and they're feeling like it's the end of the world. Imagine it happened to you. What would you do? How could you help?
I've got a little process I employ and it's based on three seemingly 'simple' questions. I have witnessed, many times, how these questions have turned things around for my clients.
The first question I ask is: "How could it have been even worse?" I encourage them to get creative and imagine the craziest scenarios. This turns the situation into a game, and suddenly, they start laughing, feeling more relaxed, and realising it wasn't as disastrous as they thought.
The second question is: "What did you do to stop it from being even worse?" I help clients find their superhero moments, giving them credit (where they thought there was none) for their efforts. Suddenly, they feel more in control and see their actions as stepping stones to positive change.
And the third question is: "On a scale from 1 to 10, how bad is it really?" I help them break down the drama into degrees, encouraging them to think about the positive aspects. This helps set achievable, measurable goals and promotes a positive mindset. Sometimes, if they say it was a 4, I ask them "Why was it not a 3, or lower than that?" This particular question shocks them into realising it really wasn't as bad as they had thought...and they just proved it! In fact, these questions make them think; thinking is a logical exercise, not an emotional one. And that's where the change happens.
So, when life throws a you a challenge, remember – it's not the end of the world. It's a chance to turn things around and make them better. Ask the right questions and you'll help your clients avoid unnecessary suffering!
Happy questioning!
Send me your comments about this - what was your takeaway?
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You're doing it right now, aren't you... :)
- PS. I've got a couple of free spaces right now if you could do with my help. Just book a slot in my diary here, and let's talk. It's free, and with no obligation to do anything more. You never know where a simple chat might lead...
- PPS. I had to postpone my free NLP Discovery Day training last Friday due to a family health emergency. I'm now running it this Friday (19th Jan, from 9am-12pm). Book here and please also share this link with everyone who you think would benefit from it.
- PPPS. My first NLP / TIME / EFT certification training of the year starts on 1st February. Past delegates have said it was 'life enhancing'. Have a look at the details and reserve your 'online' seat to experience the same for yourself.
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